What this adds up to, then, is this: no more lies, no more pretense.
Tell your neighbor the truth.
In Christ’s body we’re all connected to each other, after all.
When you lie to others, you end up lying to yourself.

Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge.
And don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry.
Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life.
Ephesians 4:24-27

Watch the way you talk.
Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. say only what helps, each word a gift.

… Make a clean break with all the cutting, backbiting, profane talk.
Be gentle with one another, sensitive.
Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you.
Ephesians 4:29, 31, 32

You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. ~ Galatians 5:13-15

For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbour as yourself.” If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. ~ Galatians 5:13-15

‎… the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.
Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other. ~ Galatians 5: 22-26

Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day’s out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ’s law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived. ~ Galatians 6:1-3

… [Put on] compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline.
Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense ….
Wear love. Never be without it. ~ Colossians 3: 10-14

Be gracious in your speech.
The goal is to bring out
the best in others in a conversation,
not put them down, not cut them out. …
Do your very best. ~ Colossians 4:5-6

Your thoughts precede your actions. The things you spend time thinking about will become behaviours and attitudes.

What are your first thoughts as you awake in the morning?
What do you think about in the shower?
What’s going through your brain as you eat breakfast (you DO have breakfast, don’t you)?
When you sit at the computer, what’s going on?

What’s your self-talk like? and your prayer life?

Now, how do these things reflect the quality of your life and your relationships?
Talk with your good friend/s about such things.

Seek the Truth. 

Your life is a miracle, and the Creator of the universe knows you by name…

http://www.bukisa.com/articles/181918_10-guiding-bible-verses-for-your-marriage

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/83649-bible-study-song-of-solomon - Read it for the words that are there. Many commentators talk about God’s love for us, but maybe Song of Songs  is pure poetry between the Lover and his Beloved.

http://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/strengthening_your_marriage.aspx -intimacy, mentoring, long haul, commitment

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/98782-reflections-marriage-from-a-christian-viewpoint - Christian perspectives (collection of articles for picking your way through)

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/19889-is-marriage-still-sacred - not always Christian articles, but worth pondering on the question: Is marriage still sacred?

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/30019-why-marriage-is-so-hard 

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/205564-how-to-have-great-marriage-love-interests-sex-fun-how-to-have-good-relationship - a great marriage?

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/92311-best-remedies-for-a-shaky-marriage - help for a shaky marriage – commitment and understanding

http://christianity.about.com/od/practicaltools/p/christianmarria.htm - simply put

http://www.create-a-christian-wedding.com/scripturereadingsforweddings.html - back to the basics

http://www.marriagemissions.com/scriptures-on-marriage/ ***

Blessings on you and your household – for love in the long haul,

1. What is the emotion or feeling that I’m feeling?
2. What is causing this thinking? Why is this a problem?
3. What assumptions are underlying this thinking?
4. God’s view of all this may be…
5. The real struggle for me is … (What input, insight will help?)

~ from D. Riddell.

It is an enlightening exercise to compare the Sinai covenant with the marriage covenant by interpreting the Ten Commandments as ten principles of conduct for married people.

Paul Stevens has produced a most perceptive comparison between the two covenants by means of the following table:

Covenant Between                           Covenant Between
Israel and Yahweh                          Wife and Husband

1. No other Gods                           1. Exclusive loyalty to my spouse

2. No graven image                       2. Truthfulness and faithfulness

3. Not taking the Lord’s name in vain 
                                                 3. Honoring my spouse in public and private

4. Remembering the Sabbath day 4. Giving my spouse time and rest

5. Honoring father and mother 5. Rightly relating to parents and in-laws

6. No murder                               6. Freedom from hatred and destructive anger

7. No adultery                            7. Sexual faithfulness; controlled appetites

8. No stealing                          8. True community of property with the gift of privacy

9. No false testimony               9. Truthful communication

10. No coveting                        10. Contentment: freedom from demands.

http://www.angelfire.com/journal/oneflesh/commandments.html

R. Paul Stevens, Married for Good (Downers Grove, Illinois, 1986), pp. 87-88

…

He explained why people have such a need for drama in their life.

He said, “People have been hearing fantastic stories since time began. The problem is, they think life is supposed to be like the stories. Let’s look at a few examples.”

…

Our lives drifts along with normal things happening. Some ups, some downs, but nothing to go down in history about. Nothing so fantastic or terrible that it’ll be told for a thousand years.

“But because we grew up surrounded by big dramatic story arcs in books and movies, we think our lives are supposed to be filled with huge ups and downs! So people pretend there is drama where there is none.”

That’s why people invent fights. That’s why we’re drawn to sports. That’s why we act like everything that happens to us is such a big deal.

We’re trying to make our life into a fairy tale.

Wild Goose Chase – Rediscover the Adventure of Pursuing God
book by Mark Batterson, published 2008, Multnomah.

Chapters -
Escaping the Cage of Responsibility . . . . . .
Escaping the Cage of Routine . . . . . . . . . . .
Escaping the Cage of Assumptions . . . . . . .
Escaping the Cage of Guilt . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Escaping the Cage of Failure …

Quotes from .. Escaping the Cage of Guilt . . . 

Has someone hurt you? It doesn’t matter how deep the hurt might be, you must forgive that person. Why? If for no other reason, Jesus commands us to. One tiny seed of bitterness can grow into a debilitating obsession.

For example, guilt is a holy and healthy reflex. But false guilt can wreak havoc on our lives. Most of us have an easier time accepting God’s forgiveness than forgiving ourselves.

…

The main struggle is not being able to forget our past. We think that our sinful past disqualifies us from God being able to use us. So we fret over sins we’ve already confessed. 

And what is ironic is that bitterness doesn’t do a single thing to the other person. It only keeps you locked in a cage. If you have the courage to forgive, it will set you free and recondition your heart.

The Look in Jesus’ Eye

taken from: http://www.christianbooksummaries.com
http://www.christianbooksummaries.com/past.php - scroll down and click on Download this summary
http://www.christianbooksummaries.com/library/v5/cbs0504.pdf - Wild Goose Chase